Intimidation as Blessing
Writing Challenge 2023
Posted by Chris Sissons on Jun 7, 2023
Writing Challenge ยป Chris Sissons
Those of you who know my earlier work will be delighted to see this wood again. “Oh, no”, you’ll be thinking, “not the anonymous legacy again!”
Don’t worry. Although this is my legacy, it’s also a place I associate with failure. I achieved so much and then, in 1992 while the trees were saplings, I was sacked. It came out of the blue. Apparently, people weren’t happy with me and had not been for some time. It seems they were debating how to bell the cat for a long time.
It was not a good place to be in, especially as it was a rejection of me and not my work (although the two inevitably go together). Someone suggested I look at the Enneagram, a personality categorisation method, which I did and to cut a long story short, I discovered I am intimidating. The main thing to understand is intimidation is a massive “Keep Off” sign often interpreted as “Bring it on”. These days I see unconscious intimidation as a blessing but people do persist in liking me, possibly because they see my deliberate attempts at intimidation as amusing or even cute. (Once you’re aware of it, it’s hard to be convincing.)
This has got me thinking that Sheffield is full of grumpy old men. It’s something we do really well. Over the years as a development worker, I’ve mostly worked in steel areas. (Coal mining areas are very different.) In steel areas, men and women live separate lives in the main. The man came home from work, expected his meal on the table and then pursued his own interests. This might be beer or pigeons or dogs but for a significant number of men, it was study.
This separation of the sexes persists to a lesser degree to the present day. Some issues have been resolved and so women can now be full members of Working Men’s Clubs, for example. But in steel areas, community is women’s work.
Some men were auto-didacts and I would include my father among them. I was the first generation to go to University. He had a qualification in Technical Drawing and built his business on it. But at home, he read philosophy, politics, religion; a self-taught man.
As the nineteenth century progressed into the twentieth, opportunities for self-improvement increased. It probably goes back to non-conformist religion but with the growth of co-ops and then Trade Unions, opportunities to study, if only through lending libraries, increased. Friendly Societies, Temperance Halls, Science and Technology Institutes, Workers Educational Associations – all opened up opportunities for men to develop their prospects or at least their outlook.
The retail co-operatives were a great example of voluntary associations that made a massive difference to everyone’s lives, men and women. So many of the institutions that make our lives bearable were initiated by working men, eg building societies, insurance, penny banks, department stores. Few of these institutions were initiated by the wealthy or government although many have been lost to the benefit of the same.
And then after the war it stopped, leaving my father with a book on his knee in front of the TV. TV might be one reason and perhaps the welfare state took away the need for self-improvement. Somehow education has become something for young people.
If there is a correlation between grumpiness and self-education, perhaps we should all embrace the grumpy men in our lives (but not literally).
This year's Writing Challenge, fueled by prompts, is about the City of Sheffield. Be surprised by what's included and even more surprised by what's left out. This is Post 9 and there are 21 altogether. Share your thoughts and your love for the City in the comments. The first Post 0 is Context: Sheffield. The last post 8 is Big Up the Hill. The next post 10 is Barkers Pool.
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